As discussed in Part 1 bullying is one of the hardest things a teen will ever go through. I personally went through severe bully throughout most of my life and still go through it today. But what I realized from my experiences is that physical bullying is not at all the problem even though it is mainly thought of as it. But what actually is the problem is verbal harassment. Because were only enemies choose to physically beat up on each other, every teen, even close friends, often choose to say hurtful things as an effort to be humorous.
Everybody wants to be funny. After all it is an awesome feeling to get a group of people to laugh at a joke you have told. But recently the media has distorted our view on humor. It has told us that instead of nice clean jokes, it is funnier to make fun of people’s differences. This specific kind of humor surrounds us on a daily basis. Derogatory names ring throughout school hallways. Insults like “fatty” and “retarded” are constantly being used as a comedic device. The problem with this is that teens often become accustomed to these jokes and accidentally start using them themselves.
Because our minds have been dulled from constant exposure to this humor. It has begun to leak into our personal relationships. We forget what we are saying and accidentally make fun of our own friends. We disguise it with statements like “I am just kidding around” and “I don’t really mean it,” but deep down we know it has the same hurtful aspects as if it were told to that friend by an actual bully.
God makes it very clear throughout the bible that bullying is not okay, especially between fellow members of Christ. Ephesians 4:29 says “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
When I read this verse God reminds me of the old saying “If you cant say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.” God wishes for us to only love those who surround us. In this verse God tells us that unless we are saying something that will help those who are sitting around us we shouldn’t say anything at all. This includes jokes that you say to your friends. Even if it is truly being told in humor, if it isn’t nice don’t say it.
Verbal Insults will always surround us. And sadly our culture will never be able to completely rid itself of it. As a Christian it is our duty to spread our influence and light as far as we can. The best way to do this is to develop as many “safe grounds” as possible. Or in other words, create places where other people feel safe from hurtful forces of bullying. Begin this mission with your own youth group. I can tell you from personal experience that even though you may be behind the doors of a church you may still not be free from bullying. So as you rid yourselves of verbal bullying we must also try to rid our church’s youth program of it. The church should always be a Christian’s last resort for safety and comfort, but if we cant keep our mouths from negative talk even inside that building then we are no better than even the worst bully out there. To “Walk the Christian Walk” we must only speak that which benefits others and not that which cuts others down.
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